I feel like shit right this instance.
2011 kinda gets worse.
in one way or another.
not entirely though.
wednesday PE was fun.
MT late then kena 15mins outside classroom since teacher didnt wanna let us in.
D&T 2hrs, was so-so
kinda bored then, but chatting was funny
EL test again but no feeling.
Today, phy in lab.
practical using lenses.
total confusion of strength in class.
like wtf?
core was late
but haha
SS, the usual
Maths was the best man
took teacher's another copy of 3.2 which had 3.3 inside so ended up finishing today's ws & hw
hehe
i'm onto 3.4 which is like... 2 worksheets in front of the class?
Chem, funneh (funny)
Mr Wong rocks la okay?
I dun want any other teacher teaching me Chemistry cause I would fail.
hah, like it ever happens.
MT, bleah
chat & chat lor.
xD
After school disaster starts?
Wait, should say during Band
eh seriously idk why today so cranky sia
anw gd thing is ppl which quit a looooong time ago came back.
think about 4+ then i felt total nothingness
& seriously no mood to actually play.
suddenly my fucking attitude come out.
then keep saying i dun wanna play anymore.
Go up hall still like -.-
then chat & laugh with friends then okay liao luh.
during prac then come back again
not the playing part but like suddenly when conducting, i felt incompetent
Like I was not up for the job
I felt i was not up to the standard.
why couldnt I be like Firman who projects it so comfortably & easy
I find that I cannot get along easily with a whole band like that anymore
after Senior's talk, I felt worse actually.
I felt that it was a mistake tht I got this position.
Yea, I was a good player and stuff but other than that, what do I have?
Seriously felt like shit.
I cant voice out my opinions and like "hey, lets do this together" friendly anymore.
I cant, I've changed.
Not the wei lynn I was any longer.
maybe I was too used to just agreeing to everything said at home and for the fact that i couldnt voice out or defend myself even when im wronged.
I'm becoming a useless puppet that only knows how to study.
that's kinda it.
I feel like Telling teacher that I dont want this position anymore
I feel like quitting band
I feel like just turning off completely
I feel like an extra kuku head which can go and bang my head on the hall until the wall breaks.
so say byebye to useless me.
no words can make me feel better, that's for sure.
